Charlie Sheen’s wild Twitter ride

While Charlie Sheen is grabbing the headlines searching for Two and Half Men, he somehow found two goddesses and an account on Twitter.

If you are reading this you have been under the barrage of Charlie Sheen news. 

I watched his Piers Morgan interview. Whatever his claims are about sobriety, that is one hyped-up porn star.

Somehow he went from the craziest partier this side of the Atlantic a few weeks ago, to a self-healed comedy genius that everybody should trust undeniably. 

He wonders why no one will talk to him.

It might be because he is one intense, complicated person that babbles ridiculousness, including anti-semitic remarks while trashing hotel rooms. He blames the network for fueling his lunacy. There he does have a point.

What’s funny these days is when all else fails, a public figure will join Twitter to show that they are “hip”, you know, “swing’in”…up to date.

Charlie Sheen is the latest. 

You may remember the presidential campaign of 2008, John McCain did not know how to use a “dag burn” cellphone and Sarah Palin only shot moose and built trooper gates. Now they are both Twitter hounds (or have hired Twitter hounds) to tell us their every thought and inkling.

When Tiger Wood’s SUV crashed, you thought no big star could surpass his Faux Pas. Next up was Jesse James cheating on Sandra Bullock. The public has always liked watching the rise and fall.

I just went to the Getty Museum and learned about what people did in 100 A.D. They beat each other with iron boxing gloves and people watched while applying perfume. It’s natural for people to follow the sound of a crash. Today we can follow that crash 140 characters at a time.

My guess Charlie’s Tweets will be something like this:

IamcompletelyfineIdon’tknowwhypeoplethinkthatiamondrugs. Itdoesn’tmatterthatiamspeekingjibberishandamchainsmokinglikeasonofabitch.

Havingtwowomenisgoodandbadtheyalwaysarguewhenijustwanttohavesexdrinkboozeandparty. IgotanewtattooI’mreadytogohowcomenoeonewilllistentomedagnabbitimakealottamoney

UCLAshouldhaveletmepitcheventoughithrewtheballoverthebackstopwhenitriedoutfortheteam

Don’tworryaboutmei’mfinehiccupidon’tdodrugsanymoresincelastweekwhydon’tyoubelievemeyou12stepgoofballswhatdoyouknowaboutsobrietywheeze

If following a lunatic is entertainment I think I’ll skip it.  I did hear of a good use of Twitter.

Farmers report crop and soil problems on the spot.

* Mike Browne, Social Media Entertainment Producer, BigRedShoes (Courtesy of Insider Mobile)