King of 8-bit computing marries lap dancer

Sir Clive Sinclair, 400 years old and inventor of the ZX Spectrum, marrying Angie Bowness, 33 years old and blonde. Geezers self-combusting across Internets.

Skype gives stranded passengers free WiFi at 100,000+ hotspots

Better late than never, especially when it comes to free WiFi. And for the thousands of passengers who still can't get a flight back home, Skype's major announcement today is a very welcome surprise.

Parodying Hitler is verboten und geschlossen

One of the only joys left in copyright infringment is raus. No more Hitler parody videos on YouTube. They were funny. Hitler was not.

iPhone 4G Exclusive: It's weenerific!

Should the guy who lost the iPhone 4G prototype be shot, waterboarded, forced to read Kim Kardashian's tweets for ever, or merely skinned alive for this egregious hate crime?

Splinter Cell stunt ends in tears

A PR stunt to promote Ubisoft's new Xbox title Splinter Cell: Conviction may end in a conviction of its own.

Hoodie pings your Facebook friends

For some reason, designers just won't give up on the idea of us wearing our technology. The idea might appeal to owners of garment and tech factories, perhaps, who could halve the number of exploited teenagers needed to produce the things.

Norway and Iceland conspire to end world

Icelandic volcano ends air travel. Norway being run with an iPad out of Madrid airport. Steve Jobs to shift more continental plates.

This week: Twitter garbled Chirp

Someday we will all speak gibberashi in Tweetspurts while jindangling oodalicious pots of moolah at Twitteronia's roolerz.

British gamers bound for Hell

Thousands of British gamers no longer have an immortal soul - they've signed it over to games retailer GameStation in return for a few hours' play.

National newspaper hacked by the ticked off

Angry eastern europeans have taken over the pages of one of England's largest newspapers.

Millions of Mexican phones about to turn into bricks

Thirty million Mexicans could find their cellphones dead this weekend, thanks to a new law that forces phone owners to register their identities.

Nubile devices replace geezer computers

Hot, young, seksi  gadgets and gizmos  can do just as much as old farty  laptops and desktops. Old 'uns  rage at the wind before afternoon nap.

Teen sues mother over Facebook shenanigans

An Arkansas teenager says he never wants to see his mother again after she altered his Facebook page, and has accused her of harassment.

Twettle kettle tweets you when it boils

A British start-up is looking for a half-million-dollar investment to market its new invention - a kettle that tweets you to tell you when it's boiled.

White House optimizes Web site for iPad

In the week leading up to today's iPad launch, there was no shortage of announcements from companies, TV networks, and software publishers...but the most unexpected iPad announcement came from the White House.

Apple trademarks iFlail; patents displacement device

Is Steve Jobs digging in dumpsters for inspiration? Vows to never put an "i" before "e" except after "c."

Hall of Fame inductees include Post-It inventor

It's a tough call as to what's benefited mankind most - synthetic diamonds or Post-It notes. But the National Inventors' Hall of Fame has played it safe, and inducted the inventors of both.

YouTube gets refreshed

It's social media makeover week! Just a couple days ago, Twitter totally revamped its home page and now YouTube has completely rebuilt the design of its landing site and video playback interface.

Space toilet up for auction today

Fancy a spacesuit, cosmonaut headset or space toilet? At an auction in  Canada today, you can take your chance and bid.

Spies struggle to cope with computers

James Bond always seems to manage okay, but apparently Britain's other spies have a bit of a problem with technology.