Dear Apple, Jesus would be mortified!

Posted by Samantha Rose

Opinion - Some people have dubbed the iPhone 3G the "Jesusphone," with no apparent fear of lightening strikes against Apple's latest incarnation of its mobile wonder, or the threat of excommunication. But divine status may not be on the cards for the iPhone 3G if Samantha Rose's experiences are anything to go by.

Opinion - I will admit that the iPhone 3G is an amazing piece of technology, and a phone that is going to be tough to measure up to. There are many things that one might absolutely love about the phone: the touch screen is simple and user friendly, the screens display is bright and easily read, the video playback is absolutely to die for, and who can beat a mobile browser that is just as good as the one I use on my computer. Once MobileMe is correctly functioning I will be excited to try out all of the air syncing services- imagine no USB!

I will also admit, that I am disappointed and don’t think that this phone is worthy of its nickname the “Jesusphone”… The phone's design has flaws. Apple made a few poor decisions, and some things make me go, did they just forget to include this?

I know, you haven’t even gotten to my point yet, and you’re ready to start in with the upset, and the angry flames. My qualms are real, and the iPhone 3G is far from wondrous! So at least read through my complaints prior to launching your own.

When I got my iPhone to the car, I had to instantly start playing with it. In fact I believe the first 3 hours were spent in my car, in the parking lot, looking over the features, and exploring everything my new toy had to offer. It was in the first three hours that I became disappointed.

Look Mom, No Messenger!

First things first, I wanted to IM all my friends and let them know I’d made the plunge; I’d purchased the iPhone 3G, What is this? No instant messaging! Even though the iPhone comes with an unlimited data plan there is no way to send an IM. Instead I am forced to send my messages using SMS. SMS is most definitely the most expensive data service available, and I’m only able to send messages of 165 characters.

Chatting with my friends who might be using Google Talk, AIM, ICQ, or even Facebook chat is impossible. I’m hoping that a third-party application will be capable of saving my life. Apple has dictated that they will make it impossible for applications to run in the background on my iPhone (meaning a service similar to Blackberry Messenger will never be available). Granted, this will save my battery life, but it will significantly inconvenience me.

No talking while driving!

I was happy to learn that my iPhone 3G was fully equipped with Bluetooth wireless. However, how unhappy was I to find out that the headsets and car kits it works with are actually few and far between. This wasn’t exactly what I was expecting from a company who was capable of producing a music player used world wide.

Apple wants everyone to take the iPhone seriously for its capabilities as a cellular phone, but it is without a full range of capabilities. This for me means that I will probably purchasing all types of additional equipment to have my brand new snazzy phone function the way it should already. Hate to admit it, but I never had this problem with my Blackberry.

Shouldn’t we be taking better pictures with this phone?

For the first generation of this phone having two megapixels was cool, it was the first generation and I personally was excited to get my hands on it. You’d assume that the 3G would come with an upgrade. The camera is the same, two megapixels, no flash, and it doesn’t work well in low light. And umm, I couldn’t even record video. Last time I checked video recording is available on tons of cell phones, and has been for a while now.

I must admit that the main reason for converting to one of these cool Smartphones is that it’s a smart phone: you should be capable of housing everything in one device- the camera, the music, the phone all of it. The iPhone 3G really isn’t hitting on much here.

Hope you don’t need directions!

So my iPhone is equipped with a GPS satellite navigation receiver, however I will not be lucky enough to be able to use a voiced turn-by-turn navigation system. I can get directions from one place to another, but driving, while looking at the map, and reading is not only impossible, but its also incredibly dangerous, and illegal in many places.

At this point it probably seems as if I’m just trying to hit on every negative of the iPhone 3G and I am most definitely not. I think that this is another one of those things that would really make the iPhone 3G a device that “does it all”.

I’d like the full web browsing experience, please!

I was a little disappointed that there is no Flash support for the iPhone 3G. Some of my favorite websites are Flash based, and I’d like to be able to check them on the go. It’s a big let down that checking out the New York Times, and some of my favorite magazines just isn’t possible.

MM, yes!

I was hoping that I’d be able to send photos to my friends in a text message; however the iPhone 3G just won’t allow it. You’re forced to send your photos via e-mail. Even though you can send SMS messages you still can’t send photos because Apple chose to omit this feature.

Don’t plan on leaving the country without paying for it!

While abroad downloading all of your email, viewing attachments and keeping up with things on your iPhone is going to cost you. Each time someone sends you an email it must be downloaded by the iPhone. This is all well and good when you’re in your home country, but if you’re traveling abroad you’re going to have an issue. You’ll be paying up to $20 per megabyte, and your roaming charges will land you in the poor house. As of right now, I was told that there is nothing that can be done about incorporating an international plan when you travel.

What? I can’t cut and paste?!

The concept of utilizing my phone to the best of its ability has always been great for me. The iPhone 3G has presented itself as a way to meet all your needs while mobile. What if I need to send only part of an e-mail, or what if I want to copy and paste something? I won’t be doing it on this phone. The interface offered by the iPhone 3G is amazing, however how in the world can you have a smart phone that doesn’t have a cut and paste feature? Granted there might be some third party feature that I don’t know about that allows me to do this, but seriously? It's cut and paste…

Hopefully my battery never has to be replaced

Rechargeable batteries do not last forever. This usually isn’t a huge issue with your average cellphone: you can just buy a replacement and stick it in. Taking the back off of this iPhone 3G looks nearly impossible, and I bet my warranty would be void if I did it. I guess when I need a new battery not only will I have to give my phone to Apple for a few days, but I’ll also have to pay a ridiculous fee for the service, as well as the new battery. I wonder if they’ll make me rent a phone to use while mine is gone. At that point, I’d probably just opt to purchase the newest model of the phone (and that’s all part of Apple’s “evil” plan).

Apple is on the brink of an amazing technology here,  but it isn't a “Jesusphone." Considering its inherent weaknesses, Jesus would be mortified.